Stop treating your life like a test
Three project ideas are open in front of you. All of them seem important.
One could stabilize your income. One feels creatively inspiring. One feels strategically smart for where your industry might be heading. You toggle between tabs. You open a new browser window to research a little more.
You tell yourself you are being thoughtful. Responsible. Strategic. If you could just find that missing piece of information that would provide the clarity you need.
But underneath that, something feels off.
Because you are not actually confused about projects you could do. You are stuck trying to figure out which one you should do. Which project is the definitively “right” one to focus your limited time and energy on?
You sketch pros and cons. You imagine future regret, then future relief. If I could just be sure. So you wait. You gather more information. You read one more thread. Days pass. Energy drains. The ideas remain good. They just do not move forward.
The “Kind Problem” Trap
The paralysis you are experiencing is not rooted in indecisiveness, procrastination, or a lack of information.
You probably have too much information. Too many opportunities. Too many things to consider.
But even that is not the core issue.
The real issue is that you are applying a “Kind” problem-framing to a dilemma that lives squarely in a “Wicked” environment.
A Kind Problem assumes there is a correct answer. The variables are knowable, the path can be measured, and if you gather enough information, the optimal choice will reveal itself.
The situation you are facing is not that.
It is a Wicked Dilemma: unknown variables, constantly shifting conditions, no definitively correct answer. Just options that are equally viable but mutually exclusive.
Pick one path and, by definition, you cannot travel on the others.
When there is no clearly superior choice, the instinct is to keep gathering information about all the potential positive outcomes of a specific path, hoping certainty will eventually appear.
It will not.
And that search quietly drains the time and energy you need to actually move forward.
Instead focus on the less inspiring, less exciting, more difficult element of a dilemma: the tradeoffs.
A Different Question
This week, instead of asking which option is right, try a different question. Lay out the paths and projects you are considering. For each one, write a short sentence that begins:
“If I choose this, I am choosing to live with…“
Not the upside. The tradeoff.
- If I choose this, I am choosing to live with slower income growth.
- If I choose this, I am choosing to live with creative uncertainty.
- If I choose this, I am choosing to live with less free time.
Keep the sentences honest and concrete. Notice what happens in your body as you read each one: relief, resistance, a quiet steadiness?
You are not looking for certainty. You are noticing which tradeoff feels livable right now.
The Willing Decision
Resolving a dilemma does not require a perfect decision. It requires a willing one.
You began this week frozen, toggling between possibilities, trying to be responsible and certain. But the issue was never overwhelm, discipline, or motivation.
You were standing inside creative abundance and treating it like a true or false test.
When you recognize a Wicked Dilemma for what it is, you stop waiting for certainty to arrive. You start looking honestly at what each path actually costs, and choosing the tradeoff you can commit to with intention.
That is how you move forward. Not perfectly. Willingly.
Until next week, may the path you choose feel worth the tradeoff,
Jeff